Time flies isn't it ? Yes, 2008 has come to an end and in fact, 2009 has begun for 10 days already! Yet to me, the effective starting day of the new year is the day SCHOOL starts! Tomorrow is the beginning of a new semester. This semester isn't gonna be as splendid, as exciting as the previous one since I am spending it in NUS! :)) Wahahaha... Facing a total new challenge every year and soon, I'll be bidding my beloved NUS goodbye by the turn of the next new year (2010, hopefully!).
What happened to me in 2008? Nothing is as special as the Europe tour. I finally stepped my foot onto the beloved continent, EUROPA! It has always been my dream to be in Europe, to indulge myself in their culture, background, lifestyle etc. Two of my dreams in life was officially realised.
1. Visiting my most admired city, Paris
2. A trip to Theatre of Dreams, Old Trafford @ Manchester.
Every now and then, I look through the photos of Europe and my heart skips. My presence in that continent made me feel like a dwarf, both physically and psychologically. First, in terms of height cos those Europeans are really tall and daunting. As for the psychological aspect, I realise the world is huge and gigantic and I'm just a small player of the whole universe. My contribution to the world is gonna be so insignificant that one day, should I leave, only that few hundreds of family and friends would remember me. And even if they remember me, it's only my presence that they miss and that humans are habitual animals who miss people whom they see around often and once they disappear, they miss them.
So I told myself, that when I'm back in Singapore, I want a change. A change in that I want to do something for everyone around me whom I genuinely care for. In such a way, when I leave one day, they will not just miss my physical presence and simply over it. Conversely, it'll be the gift, the effort that I put in maintaining our relationship, in making a difference, in being there when they need me. In such a way, even if I pass on some day, they will know I've had a complete and fulfilling life. I live in vain, never! :))
While I was on SEP, I made nice friends, yet they are friends whom I know leave footprints in my life yet those footprints only last for a short journey in my life. Yet, I'm glad that I met them because they provide a different perspective of life, and added wisdom and knowledge to my well-being. :) In fact, some of them are friends whom I'd love to keep forever yet the distance due to our geographical location proved too much for us to keep the friendship going. Perhaps, some day when I go back to Europe, I'll visit them. Not to forget, after meeting them, I learn to appreciate my Asian friends better! My Asian friends are people who keep to their promise, who mean every word they say yet my European ones are the exact opposite most of the time. I guess it's their culture and lifestyle, which is really laid-back to an extent that they sense no urgency and the importance of honoring your words. But it has positive drawbacks too. At least, they don't bear hard feelings in them and you can afford to be less tensed in life. :))
The first half of the year was marked by a million surprises and Dreams Came True for me and honestly, it will be one of the most remembered years in life! Yet, while I was enjoying myself, splurging on all the luxurious goods and lifestyle, people back home took a different turn. I only came to know about the problems and troubles they underwent during this period after I was back. All along, I have been very confident of myself and I am still so now. :) lol! But it was at certain moments that I realise I can be helpless in helping out people around me resolve their problems. It only made me more aware that though we can take charge of our lives, it could never be complete. There are things which we will never excel in and events that are unforeseen in life. To some, it's a challenge in life yet some people just see themselves tumbling and falling endlessly. I took big and sturdy steps in life so far. There might come a day when I see myself falling too. So should I start taking small steps instead?
Back in NUS, things change, emotions dunk. That's school in Singapore. It's always about competition, about relative standing like what I always said. I try not to let those emotions control me. I force myself to like school, to smile to those peers of mine who wear a masked face and a evil smile. I build up a defence against anyone else new to me. But I don't want to get hurt. I am glad at the end of the day, I still have the regular NUS friends who are friends whom I can trust and rely on. After last semester, they leave me though. Now, I've the few pathetic left and Pauline told me she's not staying for Honors for sure. She's my Best Friend in NUS. Someone who implicitly showed lots of support. I'm so gonna miss her! And yes, By the start of the new year in 2010, I'll bid this lifestyle that I really hate GOODBYE and it's FINALLY!!!! If I can within the pressure that mounted on me for the past 2 years, I don't see why I can't ride through this final year! :)
So is it gonna be a happy 2009 for me?!
YES IT WILL BE AND I WILL MAKE SURE IT BE ONE!
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