Recently, I received a news which shocked me as I had never expected myself to be an intended recipient of the news in addition to how sudden the news is. Nevertheless, I am glad I did receive the news and I finally got a close off to that one thing that had bugged me for a year - saying my apologies and goodbyes properly. I think I am a rather sentimental person however, I tend to be non-chalant when I actually face it because as I age, I have learnt that nothing lasts forever - every banquet comes to an end (a Chinese saying). It had been extremely difficult for me to take the leap of faith a year ago considering the circumstances back then and a part of me always felt apologetic for making that move. It was indeed great to finally catch up on these things - reminisce about the past and at the same time talking about the future. I have a huge fear for commitment and rejection all my life. This time, I made that commitment and if the chance to ever commit arises, I will jump right into it without second thought. I might not be accepted but I have no regrets in making my feelings known this time round. After all, you only live once!
What are my dreams now? Where do I go next now? I have had my closures, have taken on the dream job but now what? I found myself missing the times in London when I first arrived the most although I do know that there is no way back. I once wrote a post about the search for the most beautiful flower on the road and how one can end up with practically nothing, because one keeps thinking that the next flower will be a more suitable one. I guess I am indeed that kind of person LOL. It is not just in my work pursuits but also in majority of my life pursuits.
Where is my final destination?
