Aftermath of Paris.

I headed to Strausbourg after Paris. I had a train to catch the next morning @ 8.20 am so I woke up pretty early at around 6 to prepare for everything else. That night before I left, the Singaporean friend and I had another good talk. About life, about our existence, about what lies ahead of us, about dreams, aspirations, and honestly, I wish him the best and hope some day when I am reading the newspapers, I would chance upon his name, his picture, and all the contributions he had given back to the society. I am sure he will be SOMEONE in the near future!

Anyway, back to my trip to Strausbourg. Even though I had confirmed that I need not collect any ticket for my trip yet I still screwed it up. When I reached the train station @ 745 am, i was told that I had to queue up to get my tickets still and seeing the amount of people in the office, the frustrated looks that they had on, I knew no way was I able to make it. So I decided to head straight to the platform anyway. I managed to get on the train and head for Strausbourg but my heart was left in Paris still. The detachment of heart and soul from the physical being.

The train captain was kinda pushy about it being my fault for not collecting my tickets. I hate to be wronged. His accusation was pointing right to my irresponsbility yet he had no clue that I had done my part the very day I was in Paris. I bet that was the first time I cried so hard in public while on the TGV.

If one day, you realise you have to wake up from a beautiful dream and acceptance cannot come by so readily, you surpass your threshold and break down. That was how I felt at that moment. I was leaving my DREAM CITY, leaving my DREAM HOLIDAY, my DREAM JOURNEY in LIFE, my DREAM MIH. And the thought of missing MIH by just a chance further prolonged my unacceptance.. Never in my life did thoughts of not seeing someone for the rest of my life surface in me. Perhaps all my family and friends are always around me, hitherto, such that they are always a ring, text or email away and this was probably the first time my imagination defeated my logic and went wild.

Now, 7 months after I am back in Singapore, those times still flashes through my mind from time to time. Yet I had made peace with myself awaking from my dreams and those memories no longer hurt. In fact, it has become my most prized possession from SEP. It occupied only a tiny corner in my heart yet you can never imagine the impact it had on my life. I made promises to be back to dreamland in the coming near future. Perhaps the events that will take place would take a completely different turn but I just want to be back. :))