The journey thus far

Unknowingly, I have been in Europe for a week and honestly, it has been a challenging yet fulfilling journey thus far. 6 months ago, I was extremely stunned when a friend of mine told me that she gave up a place in Stanford in exchange for a business opportunity. All along, I had deep admiration for her because she was leading a life that I sought. She graduated with a first class honours, toured the world, entered a top consulting firm, was given the chance to be posted to Toronto to work, and eventually saved a huge sum of money to go for graduate school in yet another top university. :) life just couldn't be better than that. However, prior to going to Stanford, she took a break from work and had some time to spend on her own. It was then that she decided that she did not want to be an employee all her life. For the past 7 years, she had been too engrossed in delivering results, academically and in her workplace. She was too caught up with all the expectations and work that she had no idea what is it that she truly wants in life until she got that break!

I guess this holiday, I feel the same way she did 6 months ago. Previously, I had mentioned that I am embarking on a travel with mixed feelings this time round. First, one of my best friends in poly had just gotten married and was embarking on a new phase in life. I truly realised that we are indeed no longer young, no longer had the youth to idle and waste our life away. Second, I will be missing Christmas with my sec sch friends! FYI, I have been spending Christmas's eve or new year's eve with them almost every single year since I was 16! Sometimes, we end up walking around and doing nothing but it was during these moments that we forged a strong bond or relationship that I sincerely and strongly believe will last till the end of our lives. Third, I'll be missing New Year's Eve with my family members! For the past 6 years, we have been holding a gift exchange party, though for the first few years we held it on Christmas's eve. In my opinion, that is the perfect way to end a year and also to start a brand new one. We have fun, we have joy, we have laughter in the house! Sometimes, we talk about our new year resolutions, we gossip, we complain, but we are TRULY happy at the end of the party! Everyone gets really tired but I am pretty sure we all go to bed with a smile plastered on our faces. Fourth, because wai needs to work on her projects, we will not be visiting switzerland together during the Xmas period. And she has limited time available for travelling so I will be spending the first half of the journey on my own!

There were simply too many of these push factors that made me ponder about my decision to go to Europe. However, the pull factors had a stronger effect on me I guess.

First, I have been wishing for a white Xmas for quite a few years. This was an opportunity and I really do not want to miss it. Furthermore, wai's studies will come to an end next June and i seriously doubt I will have time to visit her in June next year. Second, it has been 3.5 years since I last stepped foot on Europe. I really miss the place and have been reminiscing about all that has happened back then. Be it the architecture, the people, the weather, the snow, the memories. So I took the plunge and booked my tickets to Europe!

Now as I am reflecting, I am 80% sure I made the right decision. When I spend time on my own, I think a lot more. I suppose it is because i have no one to talk to and so i ask myself questions and then try to find the answers to it. However, I am absolutely sane and am not suffering from bipolar disorder or whatsoever. As I am on a holiday, I do not feel as tired as compared to when I am in Singapore whereby I literally fall asleep minutes after I lie on bed or fall asleep while I am watching the television. Thus, it was during the nights I spent in Switzerland and Poland that I realise what new dreams I have in life and what my life cycle should be like for the next 5 years. And because of me acquiring these new dreams, I feel afresh as a person and my outlook of life is more optimistic than ever. When a person has dreams, he or she finds motivation and drive to work hard.

By stepping out of my comfort zone, I mature as a person as well. I become more independent and I stretch my physical and mental limits. For e.g., my luggage tore apart and I had to make do with a duffer bag. The bag is at least 12 kg and I had to carry it together with a backpack and walked 20 minutes to the railway station. Upon arriving at Warsaw, I had to carry that same two bags and walked another 10 minutes to my hotel. Money was definitely not the reason why I had not taken a taxi instead. I just wanted myself to become stronger mentally as a person. Thus, so far my Europe trip has been a challenging but definitely fulfilling one! :)

I have 14 more days left and yes, this time round like all other trips, I dislike returning to reality but because I found a new dream that I want to fulfil, I am convinced that having reality knocking is the way for me to enter into my dreams once again! :) feels like inception suddenly! Ciaozzz.....