A special semester in exchange for a special friend...

Special Semester has finally ended and I would say it ended with a bang, despite me being squeezed dried towards the last two weeks with the term paper, tutorial presentation and group project and website to do...

Honestly, I wasn't that into Special Sem initially and was so bent on leaving for Canada for summer exchange. However, the H1n1 virus turned things around and I even have to give up my US trip for a virus now widespread like COMMON FLU.. :(

Though we didn't spend a lot of time together since both of us always skipped lectures and only attended tutorials, I am glad we went for Special Semester together. :) A year and a half ago, when both of us left darling Singapore to beloved Stockholm, the bond between us was unusually and exceptionally tightly-wounded, like friends who have known each other for decades. Yet, when you spent too much time together despite knowing each other for only weeks or months, conflicts arise, friction results and I think we kind of gave up trying to maintain the friendship towards the end of the exchange. Misunderstandings arose, communication was impeded etc.

Now, a year after our exchange and with our lives back to what it was before the exchange, the memories still linger in us I guess. The unanticipated flings, crushes and parties, the people and friends etc....

I was taught an important lesson in these six weeks, to reflect on my life, to think of what I've been through the last 3 years in NUS and how I've lost myself along the way. Hardly could I recall myself being truthful to the people whom I met in NUS. Not being truthful does not equate to telling lies but it definitely involves certain white lies, my need for privacy, my need to survive, my need to meet the expectations etc. I am not trying excuse myself for the lies spoken, for the damage caused, for the responsibility of letting happiness elude me...

I realise that it was me who had let my emotions control my logic, let jealousy won me over, allow anger to triumph and the devil to leech on me. After all, having attracting the supposed attention for several years, it was hard having to grapple with the sudden loss. But the past two days have made me realised that perhaps they ain't that pivotal. God has shown it is time that I take the back seat and let the deserving ones take the front stage.

This special semester has taken a toll on my lifestyle, on my habits, on my stress level but it has definitely won me much more. The unearthing of a fresh perspective of life, of myself and the people around me is way more precious, all thanks to a casual chat in a tutorial some day in the middle of a discussion, over a few lunches of subway and a mugging session in the library.

Thanks, KIM! You've been truly awesome as a friend.... :)

I am reminded of a best friend I once had years ago but the last time we spoke was 2 years ago?!