What you really want in life and what makes you happy.

It is been ages since I last blogged and honestly, this space has been empty for such a long time due to my commitments in work and also my hectic traveling plans. I used to blog about the destinations that I go to but I kind of lost the motivation to do it and also I seriously have a lack of time.

Recently, I have been too caught up with work that I have had no time to think about what I really want in life and what truly makes me happy. It was through occasional conversations with my friends, with the students, and also with my siblings that I started to sit down and think about these questions once again. We came to the conclusion that it was all part of the G's plan to tie us down with a job and a stable income such that we feel comfortable in our position, where we are able to spend on what we like with a constant stream of income, splurge on holiday trips and luxury goods with our bonuses and come back to our crib everyday so exhausted and drained that we do not think of anything else but relax, play games, and eventually sleep. Before we realize it, we then repeat our routine and days, months, years pass by and for all we know, we have aged. :(

When I was in Europe last December, I was suddenly very motivated and inspired about what I want in life and what truly will make me happy. I told myself that when I return to Singapore, I must make my life right and steer it in the right direction. However, that inspiration or motivation did not last. Like how my brother describes motivational talks, at that very moment when you are hearing that inspiring someone speak, you feel the adrenaline rush in your body and you would really feel that you can move mountains and seas if you were to set your mind on something and start working on it. Nevertheless, that magical moment only lasts for the duration that you are in the talk. You will find yourself waking up to a morning whereby you were back to who you are before the talk, a mortal that procrastinates. I feel the same way now too.

All the things that I set out to accomplish while I was in Europe, I did none of those. Instead, I find myself ever more into my work, putting more emotions into the game and sometimes I hate myself for being who I am in that game. Stern, frustrated, impatient, I find myself only being able to relate negatively to who I am at work. This is all because emotionally, I was on the heavier side of the game. Perhaps, it is time I step back and stop thinking about my ability to influence the outcomes to the game. After all, I am no game designer and I am no avatar. I am just a trainer.

Catching up with old pals

In the past 2 weeks, I met up with quite a few of my pals and the gatherings made me realise how fortunate I am as a person. :)

When we enter adulthood, we get so caught up with our lives that we forget about to send greetings to our old friends, catch up on what has happened to them etc. For the bunch of secondary school friends, it has been months since I last saw them. For Ben, it has been almost 7 months since I last saw him! For Linky, it has been 3 months even. Those were people whom I used to see everyday, some every week or at least a few times every month.

We know each other so well that even though we have not seen each other for ages, the moment we meet, we embrace each other's company, laugh at each other's jokes, dig at each other's sorrows yet show concern for each other. And because I have friends like them; people whom I can seek advices from, whine at, borrow their shoulders, etc. I feel that I have led a fulfilling life thus far. Each morning when I wake up, though I dread having to go to work, I constantly motivate myself that I have a duty to fulfil. :)

Truth to be told, God has been gracious to me. I am blessed with a family who is forever so supporting, friends who will walk through my life journey with me till the end of time, a career, a critical mind, etc. Both my material and non-material well-being have been taken care of. For that, I tell myself that every single day of my life is one whereby I should show forgiveness, give and take, and be optimistic! :)

Quick updates

I have not been blogging for the longest time ever owing to the huge amount of workload that I have these days. No complaints about the workload because I feel that this is my first batch of students and I am willing to stretch myself, go the extra mile, and see what will turn out eventually. :) Though I feel the fatigue at times from the endless marking, especially when I mark late into the nights, I guess I still have a pretty good work-life balance. I play tennis and badminton weekly, watch football every weekend, catch a movie once in a while, catch up with my old pals, play tons of iPhone games, etc. The only thing that I have not been spending time on is the ideas that emerged while I was in Europe late last year. I hope that things will turn for the better in term 2. :) It is tough in J2 definitely. I am too occupied to think of anything else but at the same time, I am learning a lot in school, from the other teachers and also from my students. :) I am just praying that my students will survive this year and will move on to achieve their bigger dreams in life, if they exist. :)

被遗忘的

他的喘息终于远去了

这夜寒分了 心是凉的

我的孤独已经到站了

受够的曲折 不再闹了

有那麽多的忧伤围绕着

疲惫的双眼还凝望着

有人被失落寂寞促拥着

这样的片刻 真想唱歌

爱像风中的风筝 有翱翔的旅程

而被遗忘的是 那些放开手的人

残忍或不残忍 也不唏嘘难以割舍

而被遗忘的是 那些放开手的人

被遗忘的是 放开手的人

有那麽多的忧伤围绕着

疲惫的双眼还凝望着

这失落犹然美丽的时刻

这夜紧闭着双唇 我只想唱歌

爱像风中的风筝 有翱翔的旅程

而被遗忘的是 那些放开手的人

残忍或不残忍 已不唏嘘难以割舍

啊被遗忘的是 那些放开手的人

被遗忘的是 放开手的人

爱像风中的风筝 有翱翔的旅程

而被遗忘的是 我这放开手的人

不会残忍 也不会难以割舍

而被遗忘的是 我这放开手的人

飘过山又飘过河 缓缓的 淡淡的

被遗忘的是 放开手的人

我该遗忘的是 你赞美过的单纯

被爱情遗忘的 是我这已放开手的人

20120108_華人星光大道總冠軍賽來賓_林俊傑_JJ_學不會

Extremely engrossed in his performance, nice vocal, nice song, nice piano playing skills, nice performance...

Reliving that Atas Day

This post was made on 16th June 2009.

Title: Atas Day

Went shopping with dear BH this afternoon.
Was initially out hunting for her ideal Gucci wallet.
Ended up in the LV Store!
I knew I should not have entered.
Each time I enter the store,
I come up with a new dream item.
But like I told BH,
Sooner or later I will collect a whole set of LV bags.
Wallet.Cardholder.Sling Bag.Hangbag.Clutch.Papillion.
And finally the LUGGAGE BAG!!!!
I think I am a LV Fanatic!
But I am still young.
And for now, I cannot buy anymore since I just bought one last year!!!
I have time to complete my collection still.
I should just bid my time and not buy too many.
More haste, less speed!
Lol!
But honestly, I don't think I will ever get enough of LVs.!
No Gucci for me, cos I am loyal to that one and only brand-Louis Vuitton.
Don't forget,
It has been the love of my life ever since I was 16. :))
Plus I got my first when I was 18. :))

And yes, I have finally bought the bag that I fell in love with 2.5 years ago! :)

The Theatre of Dreams experience

It is yet another sensational return to Old Trafford! It is amazing to be here once again. Perhaps it's the acoustic of the stadium or the atmosphere, every time I step into the stadium, I feel excited and feel my adrenaline rush! :) no wonder they call the stadium the theatre of dreams. It is where you feel your dreams come true or that you are living in a dream. Sounds like inception yet again! The only difference i felt this time was the absence of C.Ronaldo in the team! :) Fortunately we have Chicharito to replace him! :p now, it's an hour away from kickoff and we should just sit back, relax and enjoy a good match! :)

Post-match
Now I really feel like 3.5 years ago. The away team scored 2 goals first and man u had to overcome the deficit. When Berbatov (my "favourite" player) scored the first goal, I was reciting to myself, "no déjà vu, please." indeed, man u did equalise and the score line became 2-2. It seemed like the dark clouds in the sky had been blown away by the cheers of the Manchester united fans or could it be that there's a silver lining in every cloud? Nope, it was none of that because Blackburn scored again to make it 3-2! Now I have resigned to fate that I will end up dejected like 3 years ago. Hordes or fans started leaving the stadium at the 83rd minute and I did have the urge too! It was way too painful to have to sit till the final whistle was being blown and coming to terms with united's loss.

The only consolation I got from the match was chicharito's signature on the ticket stub and a handshake with him! :) the feeling was so surreal! When I went to the red cafe the next day, the waiter was nice enough to console me after I told him about my encounters. He said it was a bizarre result last night and united is plagued by injuries. Once in a while, the big 4's or perhaps we should say the great 6 teams will drop points together in one weekend. I just happened to be at the "right" weekend! So he said I should not wait till 3 years to return to old Trafford and he wishes that during my 3rd visit, it will finally be a win where I could celebrate with all Manchester united fans. Shaking my legs, crossing my fingers and praying for that to happen. :)

Officially counting now!

Before I know, i am left with 7 days in this beloved continent of mine! :( wherever I am, I think of europe and feel nostalgic. This place simply left me with too many awesome memories that make me find it hard to detach myself from it!

Anyway, I finally got to experience a white Christmas! :) the visit to Rovaniemi was one that had been planned 3 years ago but I only got to fulfill it 2 days ago! :) seeing Santa Claus in person, walking in the snow, riding a reindeer sleigh, etc. the only missing thing was northern lights! Ah, how sad....

I guess because of the existence of Santa Claus in rovaniemi, and that parents from all over the world, especially the Europeans, bring their children to visit this place, it makes Christmas more meaningful. Rather, it makes people love Christmas more and also learn the joy of giving and sharing! :)

Merry Christmas everyone!